Wednesday, February 6, 2008

I'm so psyched I'm puking rainbows!

hmm. Why do I refuse to write lately? I've been crazy tired, and super busy; a combination that pretty much adds up to miserable D-bag. Ever since I came back from OR it's been pretty much a whirlwind with work. We're getting a bunch of new people, which is great because we need the help, but the crap part is it's basically my job to train them all. So while I know that eventually, having these new people will result in half of my workload migrating over to them, right now they about double it, because I have to do the work, while showing and explaining to them how to do the work. This is slow work.

I can see the light at the end of the tunnel though.

Partially because that-time-of-the-month is almost over (definitely at least to the point where I don't need to be doubled up begging HN for aleve), and thanks to the wonders of modern pharmacology (and Jebus perhaps?) it should be better in the months to come. Yes, I am giving up on my quest to be a chem free kid. I just don't have two weeks a month to spare in terms of brain power, coping ability and loss of mobility due to pain. Something was just not right, so I moseyed over to the doc who gave my innards a vicious squeeze and determined there was nothing going on in there that some pills couldn't fix. So Yazhoo, and off we go. I don't know about this PMDD biz-nazz, but I will take the pill and hope for the best. 24 real pills and 4 sugars? This is going to be like vacation from now on! I'm also due to see an endocrinologist in 1 month to see what else might be shaking loose inside, but I am actually already feeling a bit better. I'm a sucker for the placebo effect though, so it could be that. Either way I'll take it.

I also went running last night. Like Forrest Gump "I was RUN-NING" running. I haven't had much time lately, because work has gone straight past bad joke to just atrocious and by the time I was done every night I just didn't have it in me. But last night I decided I was going for it, so I didn't even turn on my computer when returning from NSI. I just put on my shoes and went for it. It was a pretty good time, not quite as easy as I'm hoping it gets sometime soon (esp since I somehow got suckered into a 5K race in April) but I was determined to get my endorphins so I kept at it. I squeezed those glands (or whatever endorphins come from) like a lemon baby! and came home feeling like a million bucks. Again, potential placebo effect at play here, but I really can feel the moment when I get the second wind (ok, really it's the first wind) so I think it might be the real deal.

Cap it off with a beer, and some chile cheese fries down the street and you have a night! Or at least I did, because I was so tired from just being tired, and plus running that I passed out at about 9pm.

I think that's about it. I've cut back to half caff coffee in the mornings, and this seriously impedes the wit. I really only did it so I could have 2 cups though. I'm really needing to hang on to that second hot cup to get myself together these days, and didn't think it wise in my current VERY STRESSED VERY ANGRY frame of mind to be doubling the stimulant intake.

Sigh. This is what growing old means I guess. Thinking about things like caffeine and glands.

sick dude.

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