Tuesday, May 26, 2009

update: the House of Horrors

So at last count this morning, there were 3 birds LOOSE IN MY WALLS

1) little dude, still going but getting quieter in the lower wall of my bedroom. He's behind the radiator to boot, there will be no happy ending to his story.
2) little dude #2 in my bedroom ceiling. Clearly this ho built her nest in a poor location. Her guys are all up and about, and in my shizz.

3) Ohhhhh, #3. I thought this was mom looking for the kids. I thought this because it sounded big and was screaming occasionally down through the light fixture in the kitchen. I called HN at work, because I deemed this an EMERGENCY, and also because I was freaking out because all of my f'ing walls were screaming. We discussed ways I might free at least bird #3, to give me some place where I could have peace but before I could act on anything I heard click click click whoosh bang over near the fridge. Some dumb ass birdhole had fallen down the wall behind the fridge. I prepared to write off bird #3 and move to the other part of the house for the rest of the week while it died when lo and behold doesn't come strolling out a juvenile Starling from behind my fridge. Disturbing both because it means there's a hole somewhere and because there's a bird in my kitchen. I am mildly (way) afraid of birds. It's a combination of things having to do with my mother being afraid of them and passing that on, as well as my complete and utter lack of any interaction with birds, other than soup. Anyhow, I was able to gather my faculties enough to trap him in a box. Granted, it was a 25 minute ordeal that involved both the bird and me running away at various intervals. Anyhow, that done, I put little dude aside to wait for HN, to whom I defer in all things live and captured but he was making a racket and I was feeling badly about the whole "tiny box" thing. So I set up the best I could do, which was a cat carrier, blanket, light in case he needs warmth and a towel for chilling. I think he's old enough for me to throw a worm at him, but I don't have the nerve to find out until after I eat my own lunch.

BIRDS FREAK ME OUT!

1 comment:

The Great Explorer said...

omg. Dude, baby birds eat massive quantities all day long. Throwing a worm doesn't count. If you starve out a baby animal due to your irrational fears, you are going to have it coming. Besides, Starlings are sooooo easy to take care of. They eat just about anything.

I would love to take care of your bird. Unless it starves to death in the meantime. Please tell me HN has kicked in and nurtured this poor helpless creature?

Love you.