A case of the Fridays

All week long I've been sitting back, smugly eyeing HN over the rim of my coffee cup because he was sick. "See?" I said, "You need to sleep more, and be serious about vitamins and water and stuff. Look at me, I've been traveling for weeks and am healthy as a horse. Here, have a tissue"

So naturally this morning I woke up for my 6am post upgrade systems test with a sore throat and stuffy head and all those other things I was being smug at HN for having. Serves me right-ish, but luckily I have soup and tons of orange veggies on hand because I was cooking them for HN all week. Sick people food, I can do. (and honestly I think my main problem is allergies. There is a cold front blowing in and the trees are being divested of their leaves and I'm pretty much allergic to like, everything in it's dusty form)

and now, post upgrade systems having passed all checks I am going to climb into the dog's bed and wait for my coffee/dayquil/sunrise to kick in and make me human again.

Monday, so far

1) wait at bus stop for 35 minutes. Finally some woman tells me "you waiting for the number 4? me too, it's not coming. Let's go" and leads me to another stop where we catch it and she rips the bus driver a new one for the lack of signage at the normal stop.

2) my 1000 bead necklace breaks and I leave a little trail of orange beads behind me as I walk. At least I can find my way home now!

Make a note; things I am learning in the UK

Educational trip this one!

Monday I learned that looking up the bus route on the internet is not the best way to figure out your bus route. Not when you're me anyway, I confuse easily. I know that I know this, but I keep forgetting and thinking that I can do it and then I'm all going out into the world and getting on weird buses. I also learned that I'm apparently kind of annoying. When I got on I asked the bus driver to take me to where I thought I wanted to go, and paid my fare. At some point I asked him again about where I was going and he got all pissy and pulled over and let me/told me to get off. I was all "whatever dude" and then I was all "hmm. where am I? I wonder if they will find me. Perhaps I should have gotten that mobile phone I thought about" I started walking in the direction the bus had left in, thinking that I must be close, and then I saw a sign for the American Cemetery which confirmed it. 2 RAINY miles later, I arrived at work, really REALLY glad I had bought a new raincoat right before I left home. It was a whim, and I'm glad I went with it.

Tuesday I learned that I apparently shout when I drink. I learned this when I went drinking with my coworkers and at one point there was one on either side, each patting me on the arm saying "calm down, it's fine". I thought in my head "Hmm, I must be shouting" I think it might be a Boston thing, because my college friends never placate, they just yell back.
I also learned that I had actually been thrown off the bus yesterday, not let off. My fare the second day was more expensive than Monday, and then it occurred to me that the bus driver Monday might have been so angry because when I showed him my ticket to ask him if we were there yet, he noticed I had gone past the stop I had paid for. I told my coworkers what I had said getting on and they said "yeah, no. that's not right" oops. Whatever. Then they told me what I *should* be saying to the bus driver, and then I also learned that sometimes asking people who know is the best way to figure stuff out.

Wednesday I learned that there are two #4 buses in Cambridge. Both are lovely, but not the same. I also learned that hangovers are totally ok at the office, and that when people say "Are you all right?" the WRONG answer is "yeah, why?" What they mean is "how are you?" and saying yeah why is weird and kind of rude.

Thursday I learned the american cemetery is awesome and immaculate, pictures to follow. I also learned that take out is not the norm. I went to a pub after work because I was starving and it was late and I was hungry and didn't want to cook but I really just needed to get home, so I asked for take out. The dude said "Ok" so I thought it was ok, but then he came out with a packet of tin foil, said "careful that's hot" and sent me on my way. Walking home with a hot packet of macaroni and cheese can be awkward, but I can do it.

Friday I learned we go to the pub for lunch! Yay!!!

TODAY I learned that that when they say "Next train leaving the platform is going to blah blah blah", they mean the NEXT NEXT train, not the one actually on the platform right now that you have boarded.

omfg

I want to thank Jesus for bringing leggings back into style. It's like being in my PJs all day long without the judgment.

Look out world.

Thanks Hunt Valley Animal Hospital, for re-affirming my original fuck you assessment

Phone call # 1: Hunt Valley Animal Hospital

me: Hi, my cat used to be a patient there but isn't anymore because I live in the city. My new vet just told me he needs to be on a renal failure diet* but that this clinic doesn't have the capacity for that so I need to switch vets. She said that she would provide all his records and labwork for me to give you. Can I switch back to you and make you my vet for future visits and come get the food?

Receptionist: If he's not a patient anymore, we don't really do that. You'd need to make him a patient again and come have an exam and labs.

me: This exam was done Friday by a vet. I'll bring him for an exam but I don't think he needs new labs. (read: you're not stabbing my old sick cat again)

Receptionist: Yeah, we don't really do that.

me: So you won't give me the food my sick cat needs because the exam was done by someone else?

Receptionist: Yep. Did you want to make an appointment?

me: No, I think not. I can order the food online with vet verification, I just thought, you know, since you are theoretically in the PET WELLNESS business you might want to like, help keep my cat alive and comfortable for a while.

Receptionist: Well, good luck. Online sounds like the way to go.

me: indeed.


Phone call # 2 (Light St Animal Hospital)

me: Hi, my cat is not a patient there. My current vet just told me he needs to be on a renal failure diet but that this clinic doesn't have the capacity for that so I need to switch vets. She said that she would provide all his records and labwork for me to give you. Can I become a patient there and make you my vet for future visits and come get the food?

Receptionist: Yep. I'll go through and see what brands we have and have the Dr here give you a call back.

me: Do I need to bring the cat down for an exam or something?

Receptionist: No, we don't need to do that to him. Just talk to our Dr when he calls you - which will be today - and then bring down the paperwork and stuff from your other vet. You might call your current vet and see if she recommends a specific brand, but I know we have all that stuff on hand.

me: see you later.


I fucking hate Hunt Valley. The reason I stopped going there in the first place is that they are fucking money machines with no real regard for the comfort of the dog. Their MO as far as I can tell is to stretch the pets life out without regard for comfort, for as long and as much money as possible. When Star was diagnosed with her thyroid tumor, their immediate recommendation was a $3k surgery to remove her thyroid, then potential radiation something or other to treat what might be left. "BTW, she might die on the table since the tumor is enmeshed in her jugular vein and trachea and also, she won't really probably live any longer than she will WITH the tumor, and if we nick her trachea nerves she'll cough and gag for the rest of her life. Also also the whole rest of whatever time she is alive she will be uncontrollably hungry and thirsty all the time because she won't have any thyroid at all to regulate metabolism. But I think it's worth it, here's a pamphlet, call to schedule surgery. Also, she has some tartar, so I think you should schedule a second anesthetic session and have her teeth cleaned. That would be $700 but dog tooth hygiene is really really important".

I made that "am I confused or are you an asshole or am I missing something?" face, mentioned that I thought tartar was lower on my list of priorities than cancer, confirmed that life span with or without the tumor was looking like roughly the same, the only differences being that with the tumor, she just has a tumor (gross and sucky, yes) but that in order to be without the tumor (with the surgery) she would be miserable and possibly paralyzed in her windpipe, and also as a geriatric dog, probably have some issues recovering from the surgery. All of my suspicions confirmed, I informed the vet that we were going to go for a "quality of life" treatment route and that I would call her when I thought the quality was lacking, gathered my dog while she protested, paid the exorbitant bill and left. For good.

And as of this morning, I remember why.

*I am anti "keep the animal alive at all costs to make yourself feel better". I will however spring for some boku food if it means another year of little dude being comfortable and healthy, screaming all night and purring all day. For that, I can give up Starbucks for a while.

After all, Star needs someone to keep her warm in winter...

Irony thy name is illness!!

Today, to me, irony is when the sister of your boyfriend, an epidemiologist by trade, brings her typhoid ridden child to dinner and sits it next to you. Not ironic (ironic being that which is unexpected) is when the kid coughs all over your 30 dollar plate of food*. Even LESS unexpected is the fact that I am now nursing a case of the plague.

I want to say I don't even like kids, but Barbara Kingsolver made me feel bad about saying that out loud. blah blah future of our world, blah blah blah. I hate Barbara Kingsolver. That helped a little.


*yes, I still ate it. HN convinced me nothing got on my food and the restaurant didn't have a "my boyfriend's sister's sick kid just booged on my shit" refund policy. It was good too.

Beety yummy goodness