I know how you feel, man. And also, his body is actually wider than his head. He looks all alien in this shot, but I do feed him.I'd love to give you info on how the cleansing eating is going, but since I'm bleeding to death AGAIN I'm basically on a red meat and caffeine diet. By AGAIN I don't mean "another month" even though that shit does piss me off on the regular- and I don't care what people (mostly guys and my mother and my sister) say about it being natural it is not natural for ones lady bits to leak one's own life force down the tubes all the time, it's the ultimate act of betrayal by a region I'm usually so appreciative of. It's my blood and I need it to live!
No, I mean AGAIN as in AGAIN since last week. Last week I made the mistake of walking by Melanie who was all a la menstrual and since I am not woman enough to resist the siren song of any other female's pheromones, I instantly began bleeding and I was all "ugh whatever, at least it's out of the way early this month" only Nooooo, my shit's on a schedule so even though I had my "visit from Aunt Flo" THE LEAST WELCOME GUEST EVER last week, that ho is back in town. I'd use BF's analogy about guests and fish smelling bad after 3 days, but it just doesn't seem appropriate in this case. Hate stupid 2nd consecutive week period, and now I shall take my stupid zitty looking skin (am I 12? am I 16? In which case, where are my perky 16 yo boobs please?) and my stupid water retaining *everything* (seriously. I'm like a fucking dromedary right now. Does anyone need anything delivered across the Sahara, because I'm fairly confident I could make it) and my bad attitude (ask anyone customer service rep who has looked at me funny at all this week), and go cry (and yell and sulk) into the coffee I made and dumped 3 packets of hot cocoa into because it just really needed more cowbell. and then I'm going to go eat some more meat and try to staunch the bleeding, or dull the pain with advil until my eyes burn.
Anatomy of the perpetually menstrual
No, I mean AGAIN as in AGAIN since last week. Last week I made the mistake of walking by Melanie who was all a la menstrual and since I am not woman enough to resist the siren song of any other female's pheromones, I instantly began bleeding and I was all "ugh whatever, at least it's out of the way early this month" only Nooooo, my shit's on a schedule so even though I had my "visit from Aunt Flo" THE LEAST WELCOME GUEST EVER last week, that ho is back in town. I'd use BF's analogy about guests and fish smelling bad after 3 days, but it just doesn't seem appropriate in this case. Hate stupid 2nd consecutive week period, and now I shall take my stupid zitty looking skin (am I 12? am I 16? In which case, where are my perky 16 yo boobs please?) and my stupid water retaining *everything* (seriously. I'm like a fucking dromedary right now. Does anyone need anything delivered across the Sahara, because I'm fairly confident I could make it) and my bad attitude (ask anyone customer service rep who has looked at me funny at all this week), and go cry (and yell and sulk) into the coffee I made and dumped 3 packets of hot cocoa into because it just really needed more cowbell. and then I'm going to go eat some more meat and try to staunch the bleeding, or dull the pain with advil until my eyes burn.
Anatomy of the perpetually menstrual
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